Sunlit Water

November 20, 2006


Filed under: Personal — by teofilo @ 5:30 pm

This comment reminds me of a story. I write for my school’s humor magazine, which publishes two glossy issues a year that we sell for $2.00 each (I was out selling today in the snow, actually) and a few smaller promotional pamphlets that we give away for free. A couple years ago one of the pamphlets had a Valentine’s Day theme, so we hit upon the brilliant idea of stapling a condom to it—through the condom.  There was some debate about how many unwanted pregnancies we would cause, but in the end we decided that if someone was dumb enough to detach one of the condoms and use it they were probably pretty likely to have an accidental pregnancy without our help.

So we had the pamphlets printed up and ordered a big box of condoms, but we faced a conundrum about where to do the stapling.  At first we went into the main library and sat down, but the library people came over and told us that we were being too loud.  We said we would be quiet, but they were already mad at us so we decided not to risk it.  We instead went to a different library, the old, ornate one built in the 1890s, and sat down at a big table at the far end of the reading room, as far from the circulation desk as we could get.  Being careful to keep our voices down, we began to staple.  After a while one of the librarians came by to see what we were doing; he seemed a little irritated, but we explained who we were and gave him a copy of the pamphlet, which seemed to satisfy him for the time being.

A few minutes later he came back and told us that he thought the pamphlet was hilarious and that we were great.  We stayed there stapling until we were done, then distributed the pamphlets the next day.  They were a big hit, although we got a lot of complaints about all the unwanted pregnancies we would surely be causing.  We never did hear of any.



  1. If you sell yourself for more than $2, you’ll earn enough to not have to work in the snow.

    Poor misused condoms.

    Comment by ~Macarena~ — November 20, 2006 @ 6:18 pm |Reply

  2. We got a lot of complaints along those lines as well.

    Comment by teofilo — November 20, 2006 @ 6:20 pm |Reply

  3. My college humor magazine hit on the same brilliant idea back in ’91, sonny.

    Comment by Matt Weiner — November 21, 2006 @ 10:22 am |Reply

  4. That is, the humor magazine at the college I attended; I did not participate. Back then we thought of condoms in terms of AIDS as much as pregnancy.

    Comment by Matt Weiner — November 21, 2006 @ 10:23 am |Reply

  5. Your college humor magazine hasn’t been funny in decades, old man.

    Comment by teofilo — November 21, 2006 @ 6:30 pm |Reply

  6. That is easy to believe.

    Comment by Matt Weiner — November 21, 2006 @ 9:17 pm |Reply

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